Twisted Predicament
by DowntownLights
Summary: out of choices and nowhere to go Anko sends naruto to go live with her old classmate Sasuke Uchiha. be warned this is an AU and most likely OOC. Sasunaru. and enjoy :D
1. haha you kids and you're drugs

**Okay so here's the deal whoever is reading this. this is my first ever fanfic ive written (gulp). +**

**its funny because i already have a new fanfic in mind that in my opinion, much +**

**bettter than this one but i can't for the best of me figure out how to start it :(. so i decided to put this out first and maybe the reviews can help boost my confidence.+**

**Soo i'll stop rambling now and let you read the story +**

**Intro**

Let me tell you something about myself. I mean what kind of narrator would I be if you don't know one single thing about me ?

Yep that's right I know you're there

Those eyes that are reading these very same lines

But to freak you out less I'll just pretend I'm talking to myself

Apart from the usual description of my blue eyes and the blonde hair did you also know I'm half French ?that's one of the facts I will be giving you piece by piece. like a little Uzumaki puzzle to solve.

The last name sort of throws you off right? Well it does everyone else

Like when I was doing the registration for this school. I had to take one of those annoying little interviews for the school to check me out and see that I'm not some psychopathic kid who twitches and talks to themselves. So when they called out the name

Naruto Uzumaki

They sure as hell didn't expect a blonde eyed, blue haired ….oops okay other way around

I swear the long stare the guy at the counter was giving me took an eternity and a half to get over the fact that yes I am Japanese

Half at least

On mom's side

Or so I'm told

That's the other thing, Fact number 2, I'm an Orphan but don't expect me to have big red curly hair and start singing all of a sudden . I'm just a normal person. Living life the best and easiest way I can. But life has gotten pretty complicated these days

And not the whole oh-my-god-I'm-a-teenager sort of problem more like the oh-my-god-I'm-in-love-with-my-foster-dad of the sorts.

And that never turns out good and trust me it feels even worse than it sounds

And with that little intro done and finished I hope you stay and stick around for what's to come you better believe there's going to be squealing on your behalf and groaning ( not like that!) on mine.

So without further a do, Here is my story

My last Foster parent died of a stroke. The doctors say it was because he was so old and Cholesterol was getting the best of him. They even tried to console me like I actually lost someone really important to me.

I _knew_ he was old and everything and yeah I only lived with him for what? A week but its such a strange feeling to know that someone was just there a day a go.

Grumbling about the heat wave

Smacking flies with the daily newspaper

All those actions don't exactly scream out DEAD BY TOMMORRO does it? But here I am now in a small stuffy little bland room with (to my horror )no Air Conditioner.

Anko, my Orphanage parent is on the other side of the door talking with the Suits.

Note not some guys in suits, It's The suits . Over the years of seeing them come and go, they have earned the nickname which I given them "the Suits"

All three of them were Deciding what they were going to do with me since my "dad" just died because he was killed off by eating one too many eggs and bacon.

I can hear Anko starting to get pissed off. She's sighing and I know from years of living with her that she's probably pulling at the ends of her dark spiky ponytail. A habit she never got over.

Getting bored with the conversation outside I decide to let my eyes roam the room before they come back inside.

There's a poster on the far right side of the room with a happy kid with carrot-colored hair in the middle. His parents are right behind him with matching smiling faces. The mom is embracing the young child and the father is standing proud with a self assuring smile.

On the bottom of the picture with big Blue letters it says "the cure starts at home !talk to your child about drugs"

I stare at it for a good minute trying to understand what the hell it all meant. What kind of message was that? Here I was expecting some mushy shit about loving your kid and all that but the drugs came way out of no where.

I mean what the hell the kid looks freaking 10! Why would he be doing , Even thinking about drugs?. Has society become so bad that little kids are forced to take drugs when they didn't even hit puberty let alone be at the awkward stage of being a tween?.

That's kind of sad. doesn't it make the whole poster impractical.? Its goal is too make people happy but it just makes me ramble on about druggie little 10 year olds.

Then again…….

Before I could continue rambling on Anko came back.

Her face was in need of a good nap. She literally threw herself at the chair near the poster. Her eyes were staring at me but not like "I'm watching you" sort of way more like her eyes just happen to be staring at my direction.

I just decided to stare back waiting for this silent moment to be over with.

It didn't last for long

"Maggot what am I gonna do with you?" she breathed out in a exhausted voice that seemed to belong to someone much older than herself.

"just let me live on my own"

Anko sat right up and Glared at me but in her wearily state it didn't give the hateful death wish it should've

"you know I cant, get over it" she said

"come on I'll be 18 in 3 years cant you just send me the money you would've given my foster parents?"

Anko replied with an angry "no" and then continued on " its illegal and I would be thrown in jail and I'm not going back there just because of your maggot ass"

I huffed out in a impatient manner. I knew this was a useless argument but I'm sick of moving from place to place. I can never keep steady friends, I'm always behind in school and I don't even want to think about my non-existent love life right now.

"So then what's gonna happen?" I asked Anko already giving up the dreams of a sitcom situation like friends or something. On the other hand it should be called something better like "Naruto" perhaps.

She swung her legs out and got up saying " I don't know" then began to pace and look from me to the floor to the poster then back at me

Me

Floor

Poster

Me again

Then she stopped Observing a frame of a tiny black duck on the shelf. She kept her stare fixated on that single black duck. Then her eyes widened and then evolved to a bug-eyed look. She had a smile on her face and found unknown energy from somewhere inside her.

"you owe me" she whispered to herself but since this room was so tiny I could hear it loud and clear.

"huh?" I was stumped did I just miss something ?

Anko did a complete 180 not only physically but her get-up-and-go attitude decided to revive itself and replaced the earlier tiredness of before. She had a big smile and her eyes were twinkling. With something that resembled Cheeriness.

I'm not liking this one bit ,whenever she had this look something bad always happened

Every. Single. Time.

The next few words would change my world Dramatically

Not that it's a good thing or a bad one for that matter

"I think I just found you a parent"


	2. Garraphobia

**AN: This** **is a pretty short chapter 0-0 hmmm well at least I added...something right?**

**something is ultimately better than nothing**

**well except when it comes to diseases..... ugh..forget what I said**

**read on and ignore the crazy lady's rants mmmkay?**

^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^

Fact number Three that you might and might not know. I've never been on a plane before.

Pretty Trippy huh? Well I never really needed to go anywhere that far before. Usually I travel via car and since the last place I was in California, home of the Automobiles and old people. I wasn't in need of a plane.

Until now

And I can tell you one thing right now if Airplanes are anything like airports I'm going to hate this trip.

Walking aimlessly around trying to find the right flight I check my ticket for the 5th time in an hour. It says what its been saying all along.

New York City, 11 am flight, at gate 32

But the airport seems to disagree with me leading me through varies other numbers like 56 and 45

I wish Anko would've been there with me but she had to get back to the orphanage and only gave me a piece of paper taken from a post it. Scribbled messily on it was a name, an address and a phone number. At the bottom was a little message

_For maggot. _

_Don't get lost you hear me _

_or _

_ill pummel you. _

_Cynically yours, ~Anko~_

"Can't pummel me if your not here, idiot" I said to the piece of paper clutched in my hand knowing it wont hit me

But _I_ felt like the idiot. who cant even find a goddamn plane. I mean c'mon it has huge ass wings, probably weighs a ton and big wheels at the bottoms I'm sure doing my blonde hair proud.

When I actually find the right place after an hour or so of searching. I got all the passports approved, stamped and ready for flight. I went through the whole medal detector thing like a breeze and right now I'm finally seated on the actual plane. I even got a seat next to the window.

A little voice from the inter come in front was asking the passengers to put on their seatbelts and enjoy the flight. That's what I was planning to do until the person sat down next to me .

He watched me with his Apple green Eyes while I was strapping in my seatbelt.

He seriously looked life he'd beat the shit out of me if I even took in a single breathe.

So I didn't till my face started to get like the color of my eyes.

All the while I was looking at him. He had bloodshot red hair that matched nicely with his eyes. He had a tattoo of a Japanese symbol. Since I'm not so close with my Asian heritage I had no idea what it meant.

But I'm not taking any chances asking him. I like living and would rather be it that way thank you very much.

Glancing at him one more time I found him staring at me which I would usually find very annoying but my shock stomped and kicked the annoyance away in a split second

That Guy he was smiling

Fucking Smiling when only a moment ago he was giving me a glare that would've sent me to an early grave.

So my shocked doubled maybe even tripled when the red head decided to introduce himself to me in a flamboyant voice that isn't consistent with his looks at all.

" hey Doll face my name's Mia well its actually Garra but doesn't Mia sound much Prettier? Anyways I just Love, Love ,Love your hair where did you get the color?"

I just sat there Dumbstruck my face probably looked like a fish out of water 'cause that's sure how I felt.

_Doll face?, Love, Love, Love?, Prettier!? What the Fucking Blazing Hell?! _

He,…he . I cant even talk I can barely think at the moment but my mouth somehow managed to spit out a few words

"fro…from my dad I think" listening to myself I would've slapped myself _"from my dad?"_ Good thing I'm paralyzed I can hardly even raise my arm

"oh well it's a lovely Shade btw would you mind telling me who I'm going to sit to for the next 4 hours?"

_He just used btw…in a actual conversation outside of instant messaging….oh my god what have I done._

" Na…Naruto Uzumaki" I uttered out loud before I even thought of how I just silently agreed and initiated the conversation that's to come.

" Ooh Japanese? You don't look quite like it though" he gave me a perplexed look

"I get that a lot" I responded automatically

"well honey don't let that get you down. I go by Mia Heart but my actual name is Garra Sabaku nice to meet you"

"thanks…." I got cut off which I hate

" goodness its hot don't you think? Well I'm glad I'm going back home. Nothing can compare to NYC it's such an attractive city you cant help but love it. Hmm I have to call Jill oh that's my BFF Jill, we've got to go to a party downtown and then I have to call Paul….."

That's how it went pretty much for the complete 4 hours of my version of hell . I tried fooling him by sleeping I guess no one ever shown him that waking people up was rude he just nudged me to wake up and called me doll face again.

If I was a passerby I would've undoubtedly Lol'd at my certain Discomfort

_Oh god _I _just used Lol Anko save me!_


	3. Are all new york people crazy?

_**AN: *Sigh* I kind of suck don't I?**_

_**I'm horrible at keeping up with a story i havent even thought to publish this chapter**_

_**well dont hate me yet!, the chapter is longer than the other one's!**_

_**so dont leave me reviewers and company**_

**_so here goes the rest of this story_**

**_ILYILYILYILYILYILYILYILYILYILYILYILYILYILYILYILYIYLILYILYILYILYILYILYILYILYILY_**

Tears sprang to my eyes when that Glorious inter come announced that were finally in New York City. That might've been the happiest moment in my life. Well except for fact number 4 which is :

the first time my lips touched the wonderful, magnificent, breathtaking taste of Ramen Noodles.

That will always and forever be my number one.

Mia/Garra said goodbye to me as he/she was leaving to retreat her luggage.

Why do you ask I'm using /'s with this person. Even if you didn't ask I was going to say it anyways.

While Mia/Garra was talking that one-sided conversation of his with me I found out a lot of stuff about him/her.

I found out she was completely whacked out of her fucking mind.

Here's the deal she has two personalities the gentlemen that I first had the "pleasure" of meeting, you know the one with the glaring problem? Garra Sabaku was his name. The one I was being talked to death? yeah well that would be Ms. Mia Heart. the other Garra.

Do I know how to pick 'em or what? Sarcasm of course

So while she left me I took the opportunity to run, run into the daylight that promised me a safe haven away from that Psycho.

You know what I forgot though?, that I was in New York city. Which had streets, Many of them actually that I just ran into without warning. I almost died I really did.

Death by car doesn't seem like a good way to go I kind of wanted something more heroic you know?

While the car started honking away at its horn in front of me I was beginning to become livid

What the fuck you have no right to honk at me! I almost got hit with you behind the wheel and you have the nerve to honk! You bastard. You fucking bastard

" boy get out of the street!" a man came out, he had the most creepiest face known to man. His eyes were in the shape of a cat but not in a appealing way. His skin was screaming for sunlight and that tongue of his made me want to barf up the free peanuts I got from the airplane . He looked like a snake plain and simple.

I know the perfect theme songs for him but would rather let you know at an appropriate time.

(cough, cough) snakes on a plane… enough said

"boy! What did I say about…" he screamed out again

I don't know if its New York people or maybe its just him but he sure has an attitude for an almost-was murderer.

I didn't care either way he just about to get an ass-whoopin' from yours truly

"Asshole you nearly killed me and that's what you got to say to me!" I knew I was getting my self worked up for a fight and it only grew even more when that Michael Jackson wannabe went out of his car and sauntered forward toward me.

"boy I don't have time for this ! move or I'll make you move" his threat went smoothly and most likely would've made me back down if I was in the right mind

But right now I would've given Garra a run for his money on Psycho for the year.

Before I even knew what I was doing I decked him dead in the face. He staggered back from the blow and glared at me with his sickly yellow eyes. He recovered quickly and went at me with a right hook.

I fell to the ground but not for long. I managed to make him trip from the floor resulting in a brawl on the street where people stopped to look and some even cheered for me which made me very satisfied and for a moment a little arrogant.

Snake guy threw a blow to my gut that knocked all the air out of me while I wasn't looking. Hurt like hell it did. That smirk on his ugly face made me want to wipe it clean but then I heard a sound that made me stop in my tracks.

"damn it" I yelled I socked him one last time on the check and then I ran away.

I heard a faint voice that said "I'll get you back, you bastard!" and then the sirens drowned out the tiny voice that swore revenge.

I don't know where I was running to but I don't think that would've mattered much. The farther away I am the better.

It wasn't until I stopped and started panting and gasping for air was when I really wondered where the hell I was. I was in a park with people on bikes going along like nothing ever happened. At least to them it hadn't. The sunlight poured through in buckets and the clouds looked like little marshmallows all meshed up.

A half an hour in New York, one measly 30 minutes and I managed to get in a little scuffle with some weird looking snake guy, got friendly with a psychopath with two personalities and got completely lost in a matter of minutes.

I didn't even had lunch yet

Is it unfair to say I hate New York City based on the people who live here. ?

I pulled out the little folded sheet of paper out of the pocket of my jeans and opened it up. The same directions, the same phone number , the same person.

I clutched it near my chest and prayed that my luck will change. That this person would be like the real father I always wanted.

But I knew it was hopeless , kind of like my luck

Fact number 5: I have an irreversible bad luck streak.

I guess its more of an opinion but to me its more than that. Think about it for a moment. An orphan, who cant manage to stay in a home for more than a few months, has barely any friends, no girlfriend, no nothing.

See depressing as it is and no matter how happy I try to be my bad luck comes back to haunt me. I don't believe in that fate shit or nothing like that but bad luck sure seems to likes me a lot

I think it might even love me

Great why cant it be in the form of a girl ?

It would sure ease my suffering…

**&&&&&&&&&LALA&&&&&&&&&&&&&LALA&&&&&&&&&&&LALA&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&LALA&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&LALA&&&&&&&&&**

Fact number 6 : I give bad first impressions when it matters the most.

Its true and I'm not sure if it had to do with my bad luck or maybe its just a Naruto thing.

But one thing's for certain

It sucks so fucking much.

Now usually I'm the type to not care about what people say. I had to be like that to survive childhood. But there are times when I really have to put that aside and try to be someone new.

well-mannered,

courteous,

respectful

Unfortunately something always happened to screw my plans at being polite.

Take for example when I was adopted by my first couple of foster parents. I think they went by Mr. and Mrs. Rain. An odd couple that deserved their last name. I thought it'd try a little joke you know? To clear away the awkwardness of first meetings so when I rang their doorbell I opened my umbrella

Get it rain, umbrella?…..yeah I guess you didn't find it funny either.

Anyways when they saw me with my small light blue umbrella they suddenly got very angry with me

They kept on yelling about how it wasn't funny and actually bordered on the line of cruelty which is totally ridiculous if you ask me. They told me how they've been through ridicule all their life about being named Rain. How was I suppose to know?

I supposedly reminded them of one of their bullies in some tragic childhood memory they rather not remember and didn't want me anymore. They even slammed the door right in my face to prove their point.

Well I showed them

I snickered evilly under my breath.

For weeks even months they wouldn't leave the premises of their home for reasons that only I'll only know. Sorry I cant describe what I did cause you might snitch on me but I'll tell you once again

I really showed them.

Lets just hope that this meeting doesn't end up with the door at my face once again

Managing to find the actual addresses neighborhood of this guy I was jumping with Glee. Metaphorically of coarse I wasn't physically jumping I'm too tired to do that. Cant blame me after all that happened

My whole body feels like it's a booby trap ;trick it off in the slightest of ways and I might just explode in your face. The only thing that's probably keeping me going is the call of a new home and quite possibly food

Mmm.. No!, must find place first

I started closing in on the address like the hunter to the prey. My feet were on fire. Every cell felt like tiny volcanoes ready to erupt. My head swung side to side with every step to that elevator.

I punched in the floor I wanted to go to and waited till the doors swung close to relax and close my eyes. my head droopily made the corner its bed for the ride.

So close to this demanding day to end. But my bad luck seamed to simmer with ideas for me as if saying. "uh uh nope got to mess it up" and mess it up did it do.

Once I got out of the elevator My ears picked up on voices more accurately Screaming voices.

A girl

She sounded pretty pissed off from the sound of it like someone just stole the bag she's been eying for a month.

I think the most disturbing part of the whole situation was the screaming location

Aka my new Home

I ran up to the door to see why all this noise was happening on the exact day I was moving!. For future reference maybe running to the door with an empty tank of energy might've been a bad idea. Plus running to and not away from the screams and Yells was not the smartest thing to do.

The door flew open with an echoing thump. And my vision was filled with pink more precisely pink hair. The very same girl that was running and causing commotion in the apartment was leaving abruptly she screamed out profanities at the guy at the door.

Every move she did was contaminated with anger much like her voice. Turning her head around she started screaming at him again. Her face profile was very pretty. Her eyes looked like the green emeralds you would see in a very expansive part in Tiffany & Co. she had high cheek bones that made her look like a model in a magazine. My eyes scanned upwards then..

Whoa look at that forehead! Its huge how could I miss that ? Same reason I missed the plane I guess but jeez. My eyes couldn't pry their vision off of that five-head.

The pink-headed girl caught me staring at her forehead and I guess that doubled her anger ten fold. With extreme venom in her voice she spat out

"what are you looking at asshole!"

Before I could respond she shouldered me roughly and left power walking down to the elevator. The pain…ah the EXCRUCIATION pain. What the fuck is she on steroids or something ? A push shouldn't have hurt the way it did and believe me that shit was sending spine tingling agony down my back..

No idea how I managed to raise my big, blonde head up but I did it. Standing there towering over me was a guy with dark eyes. When I say dark I mean dark. I know there is no such thing as black eyes but his eyes must've been the cousin of black could've been the brother for all I know.

He had inky blue-black hair massaging his head and little tuffs were sticking out at the back making him look like a ……..heh now I get it Anko.

It looked soft to the touch like babies hair. He had a pretty-boy face but older. It was weird he had very sharp angles to his face, on another person it might've looked odd even ugly but on him it looked striking ,it was out of this world. He was taller than me by at least a head since I'm 5 foot 9 he must've been at least 6 feet. Wow that's pretty damn tall!.

Then he was gone, to put it specifically he was still there and all but I couldn't see him since my head was slowly and surely hurdling itself to the red carpet that covered the floors.

I went down on my knees first looking at the mat on the floor. Without even looking at him I let out a questioning

"Sasuke Uchiha?"

I didn't see it but I can feel his vision looking me over with a probing look in his pitch-black eyes.

"..yes and who are you?"

My head glanced up one more time to see the inquiring look shaping his features. One dark eyebrow was elegantly raised up.

Damn I wish I could do that!

But I didn't say that , all that came out was

" Naruto Uzumaki your kid from now on , nice to meet …….."

My vision started to fog up until all I can see was that Black hair of his and then my eyes started closing I saw the cousin of Black for a very long time afterwards


End file.
